Seminars

When you are invited to a seminar, draw a deep breath and think deeply.  Is it a topic you are greatly interested in? What is the duration of the seminar? Who are the speakers? Many a time I have been sucked into a vortex of lengthy sessions concerning topics I am not even vaguely interested in, because I lacked the courage to say "no". Age has taught me better sense, as time is doubly precious.

There are some seminars which are so meaningful, and leave you enriched at the end of it. Some are textile seminars, like the one I was part of very recently. To read a paper for  40 minutes is an onerous task, and it called for hours of research and checking and rechecking facts and sources and making sure you don’t step over the time limit. An exhibition was curated of traditional old textiles, and the other was organised by Co-optex, which displayed sarees which were revived for contemporary times an eye opener. When the MD spoke about the handloom pockets they had worked in, with a power point presentation enhanced with  visuals of the sarees themselves, plus showing them on stage, it made an impressive impact. The seminar was organised by the CP  Ramaswami Iyer  Foundation, in a bid to keep our culture alive and kicking.

Then there was the Food Seminar to which I was invited some years ago. A lively presentation of gourmet chefs who spoke of their experiences in hotels, and other foodies, food writers and  restaurant owners who  gave their ideas on food and the associated stories kept you fully absorbed. If you are just invited to attend and not a participant, the exit coast is clear if your interest wanes,   You wait for the speaker to finish, duck and rush out and hopefully no one has noticed.

There are other seminars, terribly boring  with  the escape route  blocked. Even if you are not a participant, you might be an office bearer or on the organising committee, and need to see the event  to the very end.

I have been part of such events as well, and, given the duty of scribe, I had to sit right in front under the speaker’s eye, smaking copious notes. There is one eminent speaker, brilliant and articulate. It is a joy to hear him speak as he put forth every idea with astounding clarity. He classifies as an excellent speaker and I am sure gets invited to speak at prestigious seminars.

Sadly, after the first energising 15 minutes, I find myself being slowly lulled to sleep, and definitely not because the talk is boring. I suppose his well modulated sonorous voice has this effect on me, and sitting practically in the front row, I dab my heavy eyelids with wet wipes and will myself to keep awake,  This has happened to me with this speaker not once but many times. When I look around at other meetings, I find that I am not alone in being transported to lala land during speeches, and I daresay I derive small comfort with this knowledge.

There was a time when I was particularly pleased with the way my talk was going, as usually I am quite critical of how I have rendered my speech. More so, I showed some beautiful visuals to thrust home my message when I suddenly noticed strange noises emanating from the second row. Thinking that a dog had strayed into the hall, I took a quick look at the row not wanting to deflect from my speech, when I noticed a bearded gentleman snoring gently but with wavering noises in between, so much so that I was a bit concerned that he might be having breathlessness or sleep apnoea. I need not have worried, as his friend noticed my concern and gave him a dig with his elbow and he got up and smiled, and I continued, but with spirits deflated realising that all would not consider my talk so absorbing.

Some words of caution, if you are clearly not a seminar person and you just need to attend, look at the topics, go late to catch the speaker you would like to hear out, and slip in unnoticed. Sit right at the back, or near the exit door. Look for coffee or lunch breaks in the programme sheet and  don’t forget to take a strong cup of coffee, even if you are not in the habit. Some well meaning people I know, consider it important to be seen at intellectual talks, or plays and the like and don’t stay longer for more than fifteen minutes. A Mumbai friend told me it happened in Prithvi Theatre all the time..

The speakers need to be briefed about the time permitted. If you are among the first three speakers, you might be tempted to overstep the time limit cutting off the rest miserably as they would have to compromise on time.  And, dear organisers, remember that some intellectuals could be erudite and good writers but not good speakers, so please consider the plight of the patient audience.

Oops I better get back to my preparation for my next talk and God help the audience if I  don’t make it interesting…..